'LOVE IN LOCKDOWN' EPISODE 10: 'REFLECTION AND PERSONAL SPACE WITH MOSES ALEXANDER'
'Taking a minute to reflect on how you're getting on, can help you cope when getting through.'
With external distractions constantly entering our daily lives, we disregard paying attention to what's helpful to us in living optimally. It's inevitable that the pandemic has had an impact on each of our lives, but it's important to remember that even within our own four walls, a little chaos and uncertainty, we can directly impact our own lives. Finding ways that work for us to stay present, grounded, calm and content becomes a strength when the world is continually challenging these attributes. Taking a minute to yourself can help you quieten any unnecessary noise, whether that's thoughts in your mind or outside sources. Whether you do this by going for a walk, meditating, writing things down, listening to music or in silence, it can be useful, refreshing and a way of clearing the cobwebs and slowing down.
Moses, a 23 year old creative from London has been ensuring to do just that throughout lockdown, setting small personal goals, accepting all feelings, prioritising his wellbeing and allowing time to reflect on himself. He opened up to me about hurdles he's overcome and his experience with meditation during this time.
IN CONVERSATION WITH MOSES ALEXANDER:
'Covid has impacted my lifestyle considerably', he admits. 'Although I'm not too keen or bars and clubs I still miss going out with friends and meeting up in groups', he shares.
'To be honest I can't even recall where all the time's gone. I feel like having society slow down has affected how we perceive time', he states. 'I know I've been working out a bit, writing, playing games (big warzone fan) and reading. But it all seems so difficult to recall.'
'In terms of occupation I have been lucky enough to continue to be able to film self tapes for acting jobs as they didn't need me to travel under lockdown restrictions. I even did a job filmed solely on my mobile phone! That was a pretty cool experience', he smiles. 'It's been a weird change to work around Coronavirus restrictions and precautions but I've been grateful to be working at all', he discloses.
'A hurdle I've overcome is quitting smoking. In the middle of lockdown I was really fed up from indulging in my vices and discovered that something I could do to pass the time was bettering myself! It made me feel really proud of myself', he declares. 'Early lockdown I spent way to much time on my PS4. So I locked it away to cut down on screen time and haven't played it since. I recently had a dream about cruelty to fish which inspired to to stop eating fish, so now I'm a full veggie', he reveals.
'I guess I stick to my goals by checking in with my progress each day with a tally. It keeps me motivated on a daily basis. Plus by removing distractions completely from my environment, I feel like I don't think about them. At the end of the day there's always a choice. And it's the repetition of said choice which creates a habit', he remarks.
'I feel like I have a range of thoughts which enter and leave my mind all the time. Positive, negative and everything in between. And what helps me stay open-minded is to accept all of these thoughts', he shares. 'Not necessarily accept them as "Truth" , but accept that they are happening. Like the sound of the wind, or the rumble of my stomach. Just be aware of it without reacting. So by accepting ,for example; "closed minded thoughts", it allows me to become more open-minded', he discloses.
'I first got into meditation properly at uni. It was advised to me by my mentor at RCSSD (Royal Central School of Speech and Drama) to help with concentration and performance. I met and spoke to a student who introduced me a 10-day silent retreat in Vipassina. A refined form of meditation which focuses on experiencing reality simple as it is', he explains.
'It was one of the most transformative experience of my life and gave me tools I can draw on for the rest of my life', he states. 'Sounds all very grand I know', he laughs. 'But I'd recommend it to anyone. I met students, bankers, scientists, teachers, people of all faiths and nations. I can't wait to return when I can', he says. 'The meditation taught me the value of staying present. If I'm aware of the constantly of the changes within my body, I can see directly how it correlates with the reality I perceive. I honestly realised that the line between internal and external reality is basically non-existent from the seat of one's perception', he observes.
'Above all it taught me that truth is about the way you look at things, not the things you look at.
All that life asks of me; is be present and immerse myself in whatever each moment brings. Life. The ultimate adventure!', he grins.
'Before Covid we couldn't imagine a society, a planet standing still. And even if it did we couldn't imagine that we were strong enough to survive in the absence of our social norms. But here we are. It's shown that once again reality really doesn't care about our expectations. Things change. That is life', he states. 'But we will always make it through to the other side.'
'Covid has also changed my outlook by showing me how important personal space is. We all walk alongside each other but ultimately, our path is ours to walk alone. That was freeing. I don't need anyone to agree with me, or to validate me, or accompany me. Inside we are abundant in all that we need. That's enough for me', he asserts.
'Right now I'm bouncing back from a few weeks of very late sleeping patterns. Good Sleep and hydration are probably top 3 when it comes to keeping a balanced mind. I've just bought a dream journal so I'll be jotting down my nightly excursions as often as I can. I think recalling dreams in detail is like having a personal shrink on call whenever. Since you're dealing with and decoding your subconscious. You can learn just as much from dreams as from waking life, if you're willing to reflect', he claims.
'In terms of starting to meditate, set a time in the day to sit but don't set a time limit', he recommends. 'Slap yourself in a chair or on your bed, eyes open or closed and do nothing. Enjoy the room. The space. If you get lost in thought, cool, doesn't matter. The goal is just to show up and relax without a phone or TV present. If you come at it like "ok I need to sit and do nothing" you won't have the cognitive baggage that comes with "ok I need to sit and meditate for 15 minutes". All your doing is sitting calmly and enjoying the space you find yourself in. No stress', he announces.
'Most of us do things to get something. Or to obtain something. Meditation is something you for the sake of the action. Kind of life dancing. It's meant to be fun. If you do it with an ulterior motive, your mind is on the future and your not actually Meditating', he proposes.
'Regarding time in lockdown, if someone pops up in your head randomly there's probably a reason. Say hi and just ask them if they're alright emotionally. Small things can mean a lot. That's something I'm working on myself', he admits.
'Also disagreement doesn't mean we should disrespect each other. There's a lot going on right now. Making it through in one piece is less about trying to force people to think like you and more about actively trying to find common ground with fellow humans. You don't have to get on with everyone. But hate will affect you before anyone else', he declares. 'Same goes for love, so choose wisely.'
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